Generations, cultures, peoples who deny their children's needs do not create stronger adults.
This is not at all about blame. "Parenthood doesn't come with a manual" and some of those parenting guides of the 20th Century and before were not heart-based. I remember repeatedly hearing "spare the rod, spoil the child." Other "experts" told new parents to let the baby cry itself to sleep.
As adults, we either continue what we have learned, or we see what didn't work for us and we change! I am grateful that some of us have said, "that's not how I choose to parent. I'm going to respond to my baby when she cries and when she's hungry. I'm going to be a loving, supportive part of my child's life. My child's childhood is going to be a treasured time of innocence."
I grew up without a voice and without choices. When my husband would take me on dates, early in our relationship (I was 18), I would feel so conflicted over my food choice(s). If I selected the shrimp entrée would it taste $2 better than a similar offering with chicken? A decade and a half later, we parented with a goal that our children knew how to assess their choices and even suggest alternatives. E.g., "You cannot go to school in your flip flops because they don't protect your feet; but you can wear your sneakers, rain boots, dress shoes, etc. Seeing choices empowers change, growth, freedom!
I believe that we change the world through the only one we have control to change ... ourSELVES. Each one! We do not rise above our pasts when we repeat the obsolete programs and energies of dysfunction as parents of our own children.
Yet, we can bring harmony, backward and forward, when we provide a loving home for not only our children, but firstly ourSELVES. We heal through love, but we can actually go a bit overboard when we aren't watching our energy. It's not too late; for many of us, this is a new thing. It's a GOOD THING to gain awareness of!