Much of what seems so real in this physical dimension is not the entire Truth of who we are and/or what we can do. Over the last decade, I have allowed myself to both explore and expand beyond the physical, mental and emotional boundaries I thought were rigidly in place in this "reality". What I found was an aspect of Self that I had forgotten was there. I offer these wonderings and wanderings as an invitation to see beyond "what meets the eye", MRI (magnetic resonance imaging) and "why can't I?" in your life!
[For some reason, during the Summer of 2017, this blog got over written with another entry. While this still holds a lot of the original content, I'm sure there are deepenings offered here over the original. It's all good!]
Honestly, I have experienced living within feelings of resentment, anger, hurt, abandonment, and betrayal seemingly due to a myriad of external influences. Yet, I have learned/found/embraced and now share a way of another way of living that has allowed me to BE much happier.
Letting go of the negative has provided me the amazing side benefit of reconnecting with my inner gifts and healing self/others abilities I had forgotten existed.
I have seized my power to be happy, despite ANYTHING that may be going on external to me. The more I let go, the more I naturally free-fall into the life of bliss and joy I am choosing. I help others find and live from their this space too through my Perspective Reboot® energy healing and release process!
Honestly, I have experienced living within feelings of resentment, anger, hurt, abandonment, and betrayal seemingly due to a myriad of external influences. Yet, I have learned/found/embraced and now share a way of another way of living that has allowed me to BE much happier.
Letting go of the negative has provided me the amazing side benefit of reconnecting with my inner gifts and healing self/others abilities I had forgotten existed.
I have seized my power to be happy, despite ANYTHING that may be going on external to me. The more I let go, the more I naturally free-fall into the life of bliss and joy I am choosing. I help others find and live from their this space too through my Perspective Reboot® energy healing and release process!
This blog is an extension messages shared at Unity and "Choosing to Respond To and Live Life with Love" installment of my "Perspective Reboot® with Kristi Borst" radio program which aired 5/13/14 on TransformationTalkRadio.com (download and listen from this page).
The Err of Our Ways
The Err of Our Ways
Sitcoms, parents/grands who lived through the Depression and World Wars, and other cultural "programming" has taught us to “stuff our emotions”, “suck it up”, or deny we are hurting, Because we cannot process these emotions, many of us get caught within our “old stories” of pain, suffering, unlovability, abuse, neglect, loneliness, etc. Some of us are so deeply entrenched within the mire that we no longer see engaging with that story as an option.
We fall into the role of victim; not realizing that within that space we have relinquished our power. Our identification with the story and our powerlessness within it, creates a "chicken and egg" scenerio of misery. Nothing could be further from the Truth ... I assure you that, beneath, around, or above those shitty memories is your Power, Your Divine Spark, Your Wellness, Your Joy, Your Perfection, YOU!
We fall into the role of victim; not realizing that within that space we have relinquished our power. Our identification with the story and our powerlessness within it, creates a "chicken and egg" scenerio of misery. Nothing could be further from the Truth ... I assure you that, beneath, around, or above those shitty memories is your Power, Your Divine Spark, Your Wellness, Your Joy, Your Perfection, YOU!
By focusing on painful incidents, “old stories”, self-limiting beliefs (all of which are energetically heavy/dense/toxic to your physical body), we actually deny ourselves the joy we seek. I believe this is our mis-creation, but the great news is changing ourselves and our wellness is within our power through our consciousness and Free Will.
We are here to be creators of love and joy and can get off the pain train at any time ... well, in any conscious now moment. The key to shifting things, is to allow ourselves to explore our traumatic memories from a Higher Perspective. Here, we actually find doorways to our own resilience, power and capacity for love. The other option, of course, is to just let them go, fully! These are both aspects of teaching I offer in private session work and my on-demand healing audios.
We are here to be creators of love and joy and can get off the pain train at any time ... well, in any conscious now moment. The key to shifting things, is to allow ourselves to explore our traumatic memories from a Higher Perspective. Here, we actually find doorways to our own resilience, power and capacity for love. The other option, of course, is to just let them go, fully! These are both aspects of teaching I offer in private session work and my on-demand healing audios.
In an environment of good/bad, black/white, love/hate ... duality ... there are multiple layers of perception available in ALL of life’s experiences here. When we choose to see only one aspect of any situation (even if that choice is unconscious), we have locked ourselves in there. We have collapsed the wave of unlimited potential for ourselves. When that perspective is that of victim, we have actually chosen something which is separating us from our own happiness.
Message from Little Kristi
Message from Little Kristi
The photo above is of me with my maternal grandmother and her dog “Bobby”. Gramma was (and likely still is) a spiritual, business and nature-loving role model for me. She lived an hour away from my childhood home. Yet, beyond family gatherings, I would choose to go and stay with her for days, even venturing on a public bus from Providence to Taunton at a young age. As I grew, I looked forward to going and doing things for her and be the focus of so much love. In my early 30s, she transitioned to Spirit.
It is because of my grandmother that I remained faith-filled throughout my childhood. It is because of her that I know about and love gardening and flowers. It is partially because of her entrepreneurial spirit that I had the courage to become a female entrepreneur at age 27. It is because of her love and support throughout my life that I have felt unconditionally loved and understood many times.
Despite our closeness, there was a dark cloud between us ... at least on my side of the relationship, lingering in the background for many years. I remember one visit with her in my 20s; I can imagine myself in angst, waiting for the right moment and working up “the nerve” to talk to her about what had been bothering me. I broached the subject of an incident of childhood abuse that remained a vivid memory for me to that day.
My Story of Pain
It is because of my grandmother that I remained faith-filled throughout my childhood. It is because of her that I know about and love gardening and flowers. It is partially because of her entrepreneurial spirit that I had the courage to become a female entrepreneur at age 27. It is because of her love and support throughout my life that I have felt unconditionally loved and understood many times.
Despite our closeness, there was a dark cloud between us ... at least on my side of the relationship, lingering in the background for many years. I remember one visit with her in my 20s; I can imagine myself in angst, waiting for the right moment and working up “the nerve” to talk to her about what had been bothering me. I broached the subject of an incident of childhood abuse that remained a vivid memory for me to that day.
My Story of Pain
"Gramma, after all these years, I still vividly remember the time you spanked me with a hairbrush because I wouldn't say 'goodnight' to your guests."
My brother and I were staying with Gramma and Grampa in their home; they were also entertaining friends of theirs, a married couple, for evening dinner and perhaps cribbage. We were helped into our pajamas and brought back downstairs to say "goodnight" to Grampa and guests.
I sat defiantly near the bottom of the stairs and refused to go back into the living room to say “good night”. I remember her sweet coaxings and my stubborn refusal. Then, something shocking happened ... my grandmother went and fetched a hairbrush and spanked my bottom in front of her guests. As you can well imagine, all received a very tear-filled "goodnight".
“Kristi Mortensen Borst!” she exclaimed. “I cannot believe that out of all of the fun and special times we have shared, you've chosen to remember that one.” I think I was expecting an apology, but none was forthcoming. I do not remember my response. I think we sat in silence for some time. I also know that at the time (and for some years to follow) it did not seem like I was CHOOSING ANYTHING! I remembered this painful childhood incident … how could I not?
Well beyond her passing, when I thought of our adult encounter, my silent response to her grew a voice within my head ... "Well, of course I remember it. You hurt me. You embarrassed me. You were unloving to me!"
My Own Perspective Reboot®
My Own Perspective Reboot®
As we release self-imposed limitations, we get to decide not only where we live physically, but also emotionally/spiritually/mentally and in relationship with God/Source/All That Is. We do this both consciously and unconsciously. Self Mastery, I believe, is taking more conscious control of decisions and choosing to live in love, wellness & joy.
In 2010 a shift started within me ... a type of awakening or unfoldment that eventually led to my starting Healing Resonance for mind-body-spirit healing facilitation in 2013. With my newer perspective, my view of the situation expanded.
I was such a sweet and loving child with a gentle and pleasing spirit ... my smile could light up a room and I was very free with affection (still am). Yet as I viewed my little self and my own actions within “this story”, a new perspective emerged!
Remember my saying I had clung to the memory that my grandmother hurt me, she embarrassed me, and she was being unloving? As I reflected on the event, I could see that I too was in these energies. I was a creator of the negative emotions I had given her credit for, for so many years. I surely hurt her feelings, embarrassed her and was unloving. Having said this, I would never condone one of us intentionally harming another of us, particularly someone younger and under our care. Gramma should not have hit me with a hairbrush ... she probably should have hugged me.
This awareness gave me an escape route ... a way to release the emotional strong-hold this memory had. In this moment of seeing the situation, not as the victim, but as co-creator, I was able to transmute it back to love within me.
Filing That One Away
In 2010 a shift started within me ... a type of awakening or unfoldment that eventually led to my starting Healing Resonance for mind-body-spirit healing facilitation in 2013. With my newer perspective, my view of the situation expanded.
I was such a sweet and loving child with a gentle and pleasing spirit ... my smile could light up a room and I was very free with affection (still am). Yet as I viewed my little self and my own actions within “this story”, a new perspective emerged!
Remember my saying I had clung to the memory that my grandmother hurt me, she embarrassed me, and she was being unloving? As I reflected on the event, I could see that I too was in these energies. I was a creator of the negative emotions I had given her credit for, for so many years. I surely hurt her feelings, embarrassed her and was unloving. Having said this, I would never condone one of us intentionally harming another of us, particularly someone younger and under our care. Gramma should not have hit me with a hairbrush ... she probably should have hugged me.
This awareness gave me an escape route ... a way to release the emotional strong-hold this memory had. In this moment of seeing the situation, not as the victim, but as co-creator, I was able to transmute it back to love within me.
Filing That One Away
Ultimately, that event does not define me; it does not define my grandmother; and it definitely does not define our loving relationship! I have chosen to forgive her, knowing how much she loved and mentored me. I also know that we do the best we can with what we have at the time and that was her in-that-moment response to a teddy bear who was being a turtle ... rather than shift my energies, she came into them.
I also forgave myself, not for being a stubborn child at bedtime. I have forgiven myself for not knowing I didn't have to hold onto memories that made me sad or separated me from love. More than 50 years I held that one ... why?
This memory has been transmuted and no longer stirs my emotions in a negative way. My inner toddler self has been healed and knows she/I am safe and happy and loved … then and always! Ironically, the "bad memory" has become a positive for me.
There's Always A Higher Dimension
I also forgave myself, not for being a stubborn child at bedtime. I have forgiven myself for not knowing I didn't have to hold onto memories that made me sad or separated me from love. More than 50 years I held that one ... why?
This memory has been transmuted and no longer stirs my emotions in a negative way. My inner toddler self has been healed and knows she/I am safe and happy and loved … then and always! Ironically, the "bad memory" has become a positive for me.
There's Always A Higher Dimension
Recently, as I prepared for the "Choosing to Respond To and Live Life with Love" radio segment referenced above, this story came to mind as a type of parable. It was during that preparation that another layer of the story occurred to me.
What if this memory has been so strong and the details so vivid, partially so that it could be one of the teaching tools in my healing and transformation practice. Had I forgotten it or buried it too deeply, I may not have had as great a lesson in conscious choosing, forgiveness, and self reflection, both for myself and to share with you!
What if this memory has been so strong and the details so vivid, partially so that it could be one of the teaching tools in my healing and transformation practice. Had I forgotten it or buried it too deeply, I may not have had as great a lesson in conscious choosing, forgiveness, and self reflection, both for myself and to share with you!
What Are You Choosing To Re-Experience, Consciously and UNConsciously?
What are your stories? What old memories continue to bring you pain? What if they are there for you/serving you, not as sink holes of pain, but as opportunities to choose another way of seeing which will take you closer to your Higher Self? To that space of choosing joy? To that space of choosing forgiveness and of letting your child-Self know “you’re okay now”?
Where are you putting your focus? Is it on pain or joy? Be the observer and self correct. You see, the past is not real ... it now exists only within your own head. Are you living in a past-tense riptide? Or will you be here now, present, reaching ever toward happiness. It is well within reach when you consciously decide.
Don't think so or having a tough time reaching peace, happiness or wellness? Work with me ... I'll help you find your way!
Love and light,
Kristi
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